Ghost Writer

Hello everybody. I spent two days trying to settle on a backstory, and in the end I have two! I can't figure out what I want, so you get both of them! CHOOSE YOUR CANON:

--------- The Serious Story of Pallas Schrödinger -----------

Pallas Schrödinger was a talented author with a peculiar writing practice. Every so often, he would be struck with sudden inspiration and set upon his writing desk like a madman, feverishly recording a tale that seemed to write itself. "They're alive!" he would say. "The characters are alive!" And his wife Catherine would look at him and say "We won't be for much longer if you don't manage to finish one these books and sell it," and Pallas would shut up.

Long story short, she was right, and he died of unpopularity at the tender age of 25 (the doctors of that time were baffled, but modern medicine now recognizes vital levels of Likes and Subscribes for individuals). Anyhow, it turns out that Schrödinger' writing "trances" were actually brief moments where his mind would synchronize with another world and he could observe it.

At the time of his death, Schrödinger was in one of these trances, and his spirit ended up stranded in a space between worlds. Joining him was the Reaper Raven, who had come to collect his soul but got caught up in the limbo (whoops). Until now, Schrödinger had been largely preoccupied with the countless other worlds he saw, but now his only concern was with the fate of his widow, who could be dead or alive for all he knew.

It was at this time that the Raven, bored out of his mind, offered to help fully awaken Schrödinger's observational powers so he could learn what became of his darling Cat and stop talking about it. However, the Raven would need to eat one of Schrödinger's eyes in order for the perfected "Voyeur's Eye" to manifest in its place. When asked if it would hurt, Raven shrugged his wings and replied "I don't know, lol."

It did.

Unfortunately for Schrödinger, the Raven ate the eye that wasn't a glass eye, so now he can't read what he's writing. It doesn't matter, though - he knows what the words are, and the Raven seems to be literate too (but surprise! Only in Spanish). Plus, there's nothing around him that he really wants to look at, anyhow. It's a boring place.

While the Voyeur's Eye allows Schrödinger to observe other worlds with much more clarity and stability, it still unfortunately does not allow him to choose his targets with any reliability. So he just spies on strangers and makes books of their stories, 'cause it's all he knows. Maybe one day his Eye will tune in on his widow? MAYBE SHE'LL BE NAKED. Maybe then he'll find some peace.


--------- The Stupid Story of Pallas Schrödinger -----------

Pallas Schrödinger was a talented author right up until he drowned in his own urine (he was very drunk). Then he was just a dead, smelly author. His body was half-buried (he was very poor) on a hot summer day. It was at this point that a perverted Reaper Raven came by, guided by his urophiliac powers. From there, he proceeded to pull Schrödinger's ghost out the pungent corpse in order to bring him back to his tree so he could build a nest.

However, the burial was so improperly done that it required a great deal of tugging which woke the dead man's spirit, startling the Raven. "Raven!" he exclaimed, "What the hell. You ate my eyeball - I was using that."

The Raven was embarrassed. "Sorry bro. Please go back to dead. I'll get in trouble," he said.
This time Schrödinger was shocked. "Oh no. I am dead."
"Yes. Now please shut up before my boss-"

And then Death showed up and put dice in his eye sockets so he'd have something to roll. "Raven," he said, "what the hell. I've warned you about this." And that is the story of how Schrödinger and Raven were dumped into the bottom of the river Styx.


--------- Artist's Comments -----------

Though it's really close to Halloween, it is not actually my intent to be making spook art for the season (I actually had this character on the backburner for about five months). Therefore, I dedicate this piece to the uh...French author of the 17th century, Paul Pellisson! This is for you, man! Dieu vous bénisse.

This character was created to accompany a certain Book Worm's tale as the source of the endless books that end up in her custody. His current design was actually based on the third draft I made of him, since the first two were fairly boring (he was just standing there and not writing). As for the stories, I actually wrote the Stupid Story first and was not satisfied with it, so I wrote the Serious Story next. I liked the Serious one more, so I presented it before the other, but I included the Stupid one for the sake of anyone who might be interested.

Well, I think I've fulfilled my promise to draw a classily dressed man. I hope you've enjoyed this; I now go to break fast.


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